Category Archives: Running Experiences

Personal Running Experiences

by

Running Keeps Me Sane

Here I am finishing my first half marathon. I just kept going after that...

Here I am finishing my first half marathon. I just kept going after that…

It happens every couple of years.  I have to pack boxes for the umpteenth time.  The last time we moved I hastily packed (well, the movers actually did most of the packing) and didn’t bother to sort through papers or donate unwanted items.   This time I decided to be more thorough.  There was no point moving that extra stuff (junk) that we would never use or need.

So, I poured a glass of wine and started poking through piles of papers, binders and books.  Lo and behold, I came across some old journals.  I prefer to call them journals, but I guess you could also call them diaries.  However, I don’t have any secrets to keep (you should know that by now if you read my blog) nor did I back then when I was on my own writing in these “journals.”  It was just me and my life roaming free.

As I read through them, I laughed at my former self, pitied my former self and felt anger towards my former self.  It was obvious that my journals were only meant to convey negative thoughts and emotions.  I never had anything nice to say about myself and I felt like the world was out to get me.   Then I got to the part about the “black hole.”  I had sunk so low that I felt like I was in a black hole.  It was the time in my life when I was so depressed that I lacked the ability to communicate with others, didn’t sleep and was barely able to eat.  I didn’t need the journal entries to remember that time in my life.  I had to visit therapists and take prescription medication.  I felt hopeless and lost.

Then something changed.  I began to claw my way out of the black hole.  Even though I was married (and still am) to the greatest man ever and had just given birth to the most beautiful baby girl, it took more than that to get me out of the hole.  Running threw me a lifeline and I was able to finally heave myself out of the darkness.   As I focused my negative energy on running, I was helped along with the support of my husband and my friends.  They encouraged me and I kept going.  It did take a few years, but I finally made peace with myself and was finally able to accept me for me.

In an effort to never go back into that black hole, I keep running.  I don’t need therapists or medication to stay mentally healthy.  Running keeps me sane.  I run because I am training for an event, I run to stay healthy or sometimes I run just for the heck of it.  I spend quality time with myself when I run.  I challenge myself to achieve greatness.  I find strength that I never thought I had.  I rise above and conquer.  I absorb the world around me.  I accept it all just the way it is.

As I read through the last journal entry, I felt the need to write a new entry.  I told my former self about how I have grown up and become self-disciplined, intrinsically motivated, independent, fearless, strong, determined, fit, healthy and beautiful… all the characteristics I thought I was lacking when I was at my lowest.  Running, along with my family, saved me from myself.

Depression is painful.  You feel lost and alone.  No one can understand what it is like unless they have actually been there themselves.  It is not just about feeling bad for a day.  It can last weeks, months, years.  Running might be helpful for some.  It is worth a try.

by

Running is Never Boring

Most of the time I only only competing with myself. In this case, I used all of the remaining energy I had to pass the guy right behind me. In response to whatever he said that annoyed me, I activated my fast twitch fibers and showed him.

Most of the time I am only competing with myself. In this case, I used all of the remaining energy I had to pass the guy right behind me. In response to whatever he said that annoyed me, I activated my fast twitch fibers and showed him.

There is always a new challenge waiting around the corner.  I know most people would assume that you just go out and run and there isn’t much more to it.  Well, those people are obviously not runners.

Do you remember when you took that first step after you decided to find out what running was all about?  It was an accomplishment to run one mile without walking.  Then you moved on up to the ranks of the 3-mile runners.  And hey, if you could make it 3 miles, then why not sign up for your first 5K?  It becomes almost addictive once you have been at it for a while.  At first glance, it might seem like these runners posses more Type-A personality traits, but just because you might not be hard-core competitive doesn’t mean you won’t enjoy the new challenges that running brings.  I encounter many runners who are in it for the fun and social aspect.  They team up with a buddy or a group and find new routes to tackle or new races to finish.  Running is a sport that is well suited for all personality types.

The challenge might be to find a race that offers the most swag or maybe a race that is in a desired destination.  Whatever keeps you running, right?  Why not keep running fun by finding races that allow you to do a bit of wine tasting at the finish line or have zombies chasing you down the street?  Sure, these challenges don’t suit everyone’s desires, but those runners who love the entertainment are definitely not bored.

I know I don’t fall in that category because I am pretty certain I have some Type-A personality traits in my blood. I enjoy a bit of competition and it is usually with myself (or the woman in my age group who I am trying to catch up to and pass).  My first few races were all about the fun and socializing, but then I started to challenge myself with new personal records.  I ran my fastest 5K, 8K, 15K and half marathon.  I could always run faster if I trained hard enough.  Yet, before I got bored with the fast goals, I decided to focus on more variety.  I started participating in triathlons.  My love of running only blossomed as I realized that I could swim a mile, ride my bike 56 miles and still finish a half marathon (not in record time, but pretty darn close).

Then it was back to a focus on running.  I had my eye on achieving my fastest marathon.  I stayed the course and was able to move beyond my goal and achieve a time that I never thought possible.  And why not run another marathon 3 weeks later… this one with a 2,000 foot climb.  It was that marathon that brought me to where I am now: enjoying nature and all of its beauty.  Might as well throw in the challenge of running up endless hills to the tops of peaks.  I thought about the trails in my own backyard.  I’m here, in Colorado, so why not take advantage of what nature has to offer?

My next challenge does have something to do with speed.  A much slower speed up and down hills, over rocks, through forests, in snow and over ice.  Yet, slow would not be a new and exciting challenge all by itself.  It needs to be combined with distance.  So, my next goal is to run an ultramarathon… 50 miles to be exact.

At this rate, I don’t think I will ever get bored with running.  There are so many new routes to try, new races to travel to, new distances to explore, faster speeds to tackle and many more new running buddies to acquire along the way.

by

The Running Community

Spending Thanksgiving morning with great running buddies!

Spending Thanksgiving morning with great running buddies!

Last night was our annual Christmas light run hosted by our local club, the Foothills Running and Cycling club.  I walked into the meeting location not surprised to see about 30 runners milling about.  It didn’t take long for me to find friends in the crowd.  Back in the day (when I was a bit younger), I used to go to parties, bars or clubs (okay, maybe I have only gone to like one real club) because I thought that was the cool thing to do for fun.  Now I find myself participating in social activities that revolve around running… probably a bit healthier for the mind and body.  But don’t get me wrong, we do enjoy a beer and some not-so-healthy food afterwards.

I never really knew which crowd suited me best.  In high school I was definitely hanging out with the nerd types who always got their homework done and even did extra credit in their free time.  Yet, I wasn’t always so “good” in that sense because I felt a need to rebel (nothing serious, but I would push the limit sometimes).  Then I went to college and became a mountain woman of sorts (well, just picture Alaska) and tried to mix outdoor recreation with party central.  After that chapter, I decided to get a tad more serious and joined the military.  I was basically told I didn’t fit in when I was constantly yelled at for not marching correctly.  Seriously, I have no coordination and I didn’t think it was a requirement.  I should have taken dance classes in order to prepare.

That whole military chapter didn’t last long.  I settled for being a military wife.  Yet, after serving in the military, I didn’t really want to live and breathe it 24-7.  I couldn’t even fathom the idea of living on base and solely associating with military friends.  My husband pretty much felt the same way.  However, it was difficult to find friends when the military was our life and I was only able to work in jobs that I wasn’t one hundred percent happy with.

It’s sad, but I can’t even say that I fit in with the mom types.  I find little pleasure in group playdates (I am more of a one-on-one mom), attending social gatherings meant for moms and comparing mommy notes with other moms.  I prefer not to plan and coordintate, but to just grab the kids and head to the playground when it is most convenient for us, take a hike on a local trail or load up the bikes and jogging stroller for some family exercise.  Maybe I should do more things with other moms and their kids, but I haven’t quite found a connection yet.  For some reason, we always became good friends with people who don’t have kids (they always have kids after we move away).

It took a few years, but I finally figured it out.  I have a passion for running and it was something I could do that wasn’t part of my job or the military.  I decided to sign up for Team in Training so I would be forced to run with a group (and of course I would be supporting a good cause in the process).   An introvert like me just needs to find the strength to take that first step.  Fortunately, it didn’t take long for me to figure out that runners are some of the nicest, friendliest people I have ever met.  Runners are alike in so many ways.  If I may generalize, they are intrinsically motivated, open-minded, disciplined, driven, hard-working and compassionate.   They are the type of people who I want to surround myself with.  Not surprising, there are full-time working mommy runners, stay-at-home mommy runners, military spouse runners, active duty military runners, teacher runners, hippie runners (just thinking back to life in Alaska), college runners, etc.  We all know that everyone has more than one title in life.

If you are a runner, but hesitant about running with another runner and joining a group, don’t be.  The running community is all-inclusive.  It doesn’t matter if you are a jogger, a slow runner, a fast runner, a short-distance runner, a long-distance runner, a chatty runner, a quiet runner… you get the point. Runners will accept you for who you are.  If you need proof of how great the running community is, then just look up articles about how runners are always running for a cause.  After the Boston incident, they got right back up and strengthened bonds.  I’m proud to be a member of the running community!

In any case, I hope you find what you are looking for.  We should all surround ourselves with people who make us happy, build on our self-confidence and enourage us to strive for greater things.

by

Who I Am

Sharing my joy with my family means the world to me!

Sharing my joy with my family means the world to me!

It takes a long time to figure out who you are supposed to be and where you are supposed to go.  Some people say you make your own destiny, some believe in fate.  Others believe that a higher being determines our path in life.  I suppose that I kind of believe in all of those ideas.  Sometimes I think that things happen just because they were supposed to happen.  For example, what would my life be like if I hadn’t joined the Coast Guard to meet my wonderful husband and create three of the most precious human beings?  I was not one of those people who thought about joining the military during my childhood.  In fact, it was a very spur of the moment decision.

Yet, in a way, I did make my own destiny.  I chose not to fall victim to the harsh realities that were presented to me during my childhood.  I made my own choices about who I didn’t want to be and where I didn’t want to go.  I didn’t know quite where I was going, but I definitely knew where I didn’t want to end up.  Of course it wasn’t always easy to be “me” because I struggled with my identity, especially during my early twenties when I was still figuring out what life was all about.

I thought that if I believed in a higher power then maybe I would be pointed in the right direction.  Well, it didn’t quite work out that way or maybe it did and I just didn’t realize it.  I tried going to church and I wasn’t always sure if I belonged there.  Yet, I can’t help wonder about the beauty that surrounds us in the natural world and the amazing beings that we create.  Then I think about the sadness, loss, hate and grief and I wonder why that is necessary.

I would like to say that it all came to me when I got married.  But that wouldn’t be a true statement.  I would like to say that it came to me when I had my first child.  But I still didn’t have it figured out.  It took me many years to get it together and I still don’t have all of the answers.  I suspect that I never will.

Running has opened up a whole new world and I now see things in a different light.  I am more appreciative of what I have and I work hard to do what’s right.  Actually, I work harder than I ever thought possible.  Something inside of me turned on and I am more of a fighter than I ever was, mentally and physically.   I have made a connection to my inner self and the world makes more sense to me.  I am still not sure if I have the power to make the changes or if my fate is already sealed, but it doesn’t really matter.  I have to live each moment with the realization that I will never know what is going to happen next.  I can only hope that my life experiences have made me strong enough to accept what may come.

It is still a challenge to figure out what I am supposed to be doing.  All I know is that I want to make a positive impression.  I want people to have something meaningful to say when they attend my funeral.  I want my family to know that I made my mark on the world and that they can be proud of who I was.  I want them to move on knowing that I was happy with who I was.  I can’t be perfect.  Nobody can.  But I can work with what I have and make the best of it.  Some will agree.  Yet, others won’t.  I can’t be concerned with that.

Some people say that putting 26.2 stickers on your car and posting your running achievements on facebook is a bit obnoxious.  But this is who I am.  I am a wife, a daughter, a mother AND a runner.  I can’t help but feel the need to reach out to others and share my passion of running.  That is the reason why I decided to be a coach.  If I can make a difference in someone else’s life, then that will be the answer to my question.

by

The Enlightening Marathon

Photos never do it justice... that was freakin' steep!

Photos never do it justice… that was freakin’ steep!

Most runners have a mantra (or two) that help them overcome a tough situation.  It might be a simple as “you can do it” or as deep as “keep running for those who can’t.”  I am typically deep and sentimental when it comes to my mantras.  I always think about how my mother would be proud, how I can be a positive role model to my daughters or about friends and family who have fought (or are fighting) cancer.   Those thoughts motivate me to push through the mental and physical barriers that try to keep me from moving forward.

Yesterday’s mantra couldn’t be further away on the mantra spectrum.  You see, I was smart (or stupid… still not sure yet) and decided to run a marathon 3 weeks after achieving a personal record in a marathon.  And not just any marathon…. a marathon that included a 2,200 foot climb up steep and winding roads through a national park.  A marathon that was going to be the most scenic racing adventure of my running career thus far, but a marathon that would also be the toughest one for me to complete.  I knew I could do it, but I wasn’t sure at what cost.  Would my knees buckle and leave me crying on the side of the road?  Would I hurt my ego as I crossed the finish line in last place?

We drove the route the night before the marathon.  It wasn’t like I hadn’t seen it before.  Last spring we came out and did the tourist thing.  At that time I never imagined running the road we were driving on.  As we drove it again the night before, I had a whole new perspective.  Wow, that was quite a climb!  I will be running up that?  This part of the road looks relatively flat, but there really is no true flat section.  I have to run down that?  How will my knee react?  There were some positive thoughts as well.  Holy cow, would you look at that view??  I get to stare at that for 5 or more hours?  I should just look at this marathon as a run to tour the Colorado National Monument.

I went to sleep thinking that everything would be alright.  And then I was wide awake at 4:30 am even though I didn’t need to wake up until 6.  My mind was racing.  Should I wear that shirt or the other one?  How many bottles of water should I carry?  What should I eat for breakfast?  What if it is colder at the top?  How the heck am I going to get up those hills??

Eventually it was time.  I was there at the starting line.  The road started off as a slight incline for the first half of a mile and then it went up.  Up, up and up.  I kept thinking about getting to the halfway point.  Once I was there it would all be downhill.  Then a negative thought popped into my mind.  Yeah, downhill looks good on paper, but the reality is that you could be hurting so bad by the time you get there that it really sucks to go down.  It is not fun to run downhill when your quads are on fire.

But wait, here comes the mantra.  I was recently reading a book about running (okay,  I tend to read these books a lot) and I came across an excerpt on hill training.  It emphasized the need to activate your glutes (yes, your butt) in order to alleviate some of the work that is ultimately placed on your quads when running up a hill.  It happened to mention the fact that you are definitely using your quads if you run up a steep incline and feel the need to put your hands on your knees.  Yes, I was just doing that the other day when I was running up a steep trail.

So, I decided on a new mantra: “Activate your glutes!”  Yep, that was it.  I kept repeating that over and over in my head (maybe out loud a couple of times too… not sure since I was in a daze).  I wasn’t really sure how to activate my glutes, but I just kept my focus on them and hoped that it was working.  Any time I felt like I wasn’t going to make it up the hill I just repeated the mantra.  Somehow I made it up the worst part… the first 4.5 miles of straight climbing.  That was when I reached the first aid station and was greeted with volunteers cheering me on.  I felt like I had just won a major victory!  I was pumping my arms up in the air!  And then I remembered that I still had 21.7 miles to go.  Um, I think I just used all of my energy on that climb and I am not sure how I am going to keep climbing.  “Activate your glutes!”  Then I was off again!

Any slight flatness or decline and I felt like I could fly.  Running on level road or running down a slight incline just seemed so much easier than before!  Of course I didn’t know how fast I was going.  I had decided to leave my Garmin behind and just run based on how I felt.  Afterall, my only goal was to finish.

It seemed like forever, but I finally made it to the final incline (well, I was smart enough to tell myself that there could be a few surprises down the road… which there were).  I was feeling okay.  My legs were still with me and I didn’t feel any unusual pains (not even in my knee).  I tried to tell myself to take it easy going down.  From mile 14 to mile 20 it wasn’t so bad.  A bit rolling, some flattish, slight declines with a few of those “surprise” inclines.

Then I looked over the cliff and saw the road.  Steep switchbacks heading down.  I looked out and could see the park where I would finish.  Just a down and out.  That was it.  I tried to tell myself to take it nice and easy going down, but I don’t usually listen when I spout good advice.  I didn’t focus on my glutes as much because I turned my attention to my form.  I tried to get into a downhill rhythm.  Then I saw them.  The runners who were walking down the hill.  One even stopped to stretch his… yep, he was stretching his quads.  I wanted to yell “you should have activated your glutes on the uphills!” but I figured that it was better left unsaid and I just said “Hi!” instead.  I was so sure that I was going to get passed going downhill.  Yet, somehow I managed to be the one doing all of the passing.  That made me wonder if I was running too fast.

When I passed mile 22 I knew I was as good as gold.  Miles 20-22 are usually my toughest both mentally and physically.  Not this time.  I was even speeding up.  And then there it was right before mile 25.  One more freakin’ hill.  Nothing major, but not something you were hoping to see again.  I just kept going because I didn’t want to be passed.  As I came down I saw a friend of mine.  I ran right up to him and we crossed the finish line together.  I was so relieved to be done that it didn’t dawn on me for a minute or two to find out what my time was.  I couldn’t believe it when I found out I had done that crazy course in 4:03:34!  I was expecting to take at least 5 hours.

Then I realized something.  Nothing is out of reach.  You just have to work hard to grab it.  I never believed I could be so strong and endure so much.  Running that marathon was an enlightening experience that I will never forget.  What’s next?  I’m not sure yet, but I will let you know.